Betty's
Alaina Martin

So, I'm doing business with Matty where we do business best: drunk in a bar. He's convincing me that my opinion ... matters. My opinion, mine. Having been cut, re-cut, and cut again, I can't understand why. He must be talking about the Tweek. Kind of like Blaise Rosenthal's opinion has the Tweek, or Dori Wetzel's opinion has the Tweek. We all come from deep, deep in the forest. Calaveras County, where people jump frogs for a living. We were raised in a bubble of space and time, we don't see things like you do. Sometimes we have trouble ... integrating into ... the mainstream.

Anyway, what I'm thinking about today is Bettys. Chickens, Chiquitas, Nuggets, Hoes, Sluts, Chicks and Bitches. I didn't understand it at first. some guy called me a Nugget. and with my Tweek, I responded, "You mean like, Golden Nugget?"

He says, "No, like Chicken Nugget!"

I sensed hostility. I was confused. Over time I did realize that on the snowboarding scene, the attitude towards women isn't the most welcoming. It's reflected in the words used on the snow, and it's reflected in the industry, the mags, the films, and the apparel.

After learning to snowboard, I was just so excited. I trundled my little body down to my local boarding shop to get my gear. This gear isn't for girls! None of it fits. The gloves are too big, the pants are too big, and even the boots I wear today I gotta cover with straps, and wear a bunch of socks. All right, it's a slight inconvenience. Nothing that's going to stop the girl from going.

Then there was the time I was doing a little research down at the board shop. I was looking through snowboarding magazines from years and years ago. With the exception of some occasional tits and ass, there weren't any girls. Maybe a token girl here or there, but basically, nothing. I felt so left out. I needed someone to look up to, something to let me know I wasn't the only one.

And then there's the attitude, the vibe. It's like nothing I've ever experienced before. It's constant. You're on top and you want to stay there. In a room full of guys, the conversation continues, and I'm not included. I'm a slut if I want you. I'm a bitch if I don't. It wears me out and it drags me down. It's intimidation. We didn't have this in the hills. I never expected it, and I'll never get used to it. It isn't all the guys who send the vibe, there's definitely a lot of real swell guys out there. It's just that few ...

To all the girls reading this, I know how you are. I know you thumb through a Heckler much like guys would thumb through a Hustler. A little imagination is all it takes. I want you to know that snowboarders are the greatest girls I know. You're women of substance. You're not afraid. Roxanne Martin, Carla Gustka, Kelly Wright, Dorah Wetzel, Norah Foster, you girls go off. But, I hope you realize that if you want the attitude to change, it's really up to you. Stick up for yourself, and stick up for your friends. If you can't respect each other, don't even expect any guy to respect you. They see the separation and the competition. You know what I'm talking about, just get over it. Oh yeah, don't go around bapping each other over the head like that big mean Betty did me last summer.

I know one thing for sure though. It's better every day. There's lots of girls on the snow, gorgeous girls in the mags and beauties in the films. We're buying lots of products, consuming lots of crap. This is where it all begins and how you can make your presence felt. The last edition of Snowboarder Magazine is a good example of where the industry is headed. It includes a great article and some glam photos of four women. This year's film releases include more girls going big than ever. In an industry moving so fast, I know it won't take long to catch up. The change is most definitely in effect, and darn it, I'm stoked.

You know what else? Boys love girls, and girls love boys. Without us, you're waxing, and without you, we're bumming. We only go around this world once, so let's go off. Rage, whatever. Let's get our minds together, and stay that way. Let's kiss, and hug, and kiss and hug. We're young dammit. Let's kiss and hug and get all sticky together, forever and ever and ever ...

January, 1994